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Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Figure 911...My Battles With the Scale & Latest Progress Update...

Hey Guys!!!!
Thanks for stopping by my site and tuning into my latest progress update!!!! Well, this is a bit of a rant/vent session AND update... LOL... The reason i called this post Figure 911 is because i KNOW theres hundreds and thousands of other female competitors that suffer from warped body image/scale battles/tape-measure battles/water retention dilemmas, and all sorts of psycho-neurotic mental problems... This is why a lot of times you see/meet women that look SENSATIONAL but when you tell them they look good, in their head they are really thinking "oh do i? but im holding like 10lbs of water, i just had a cheat meal so my abs are gone, im holding water in my lower body cause my periods coming ... etc.. etc..." it's really awful because at the end of the day we DID train our asses off and commit to clean eating in order to get to where we're standing..
Here are some pics i took after my nice relaxing incline powerwalk on the treadmill (1 hour). I took them @ the studio downstairs at the gym! The lights were almost ALL OFF because Monday was a holiday (yesterday) so i guess it's hard to really see what i "look like" lol :


My current diet is PLAGUED with green vegetables... i mean POUNDS and POUNDS a day... lots of water, still eating a fair bit of clean carbs, this phase is lower in fats... I have kept the carbs in for muscle hardness/fullness and because my body fat is low i don't really need to cut back on carbs dramatically... also, with just having started weight training again 1.5 weeks ago and doing an hour or more of cardio 4-5 times a week i'd be walking around like a brain-fogged, depleted retard if i didn't have carbs in my eating plan..
SOOOOOOOO what's REALLY f*cking with my head now is the fact that my weight will fluctuate from 139lbs. to 149lbs... sooo randomly... I have kept cheat meals/days in only when i deserve/earn them and its messed up because lots of times after cheating i weigh less.. i understand the science behind why this is, but i STILL allow the scale to torture me!!! The funny thing is, in order to LOOK SHREDDED YEAR ROUND i CANT walk around at 130-135lbs (stage weight) or i would look completely depleted and flat!!! So for those of you that have SERIOUS muscle density from years of training (im in my 10th year of working out) or a solid bone structure, DONT LOOK AT THE MUTHAAAA F*CKINGGG SCALE!!! Consider this, if you had a plastic blow-up doll full of cotton and gummy worms, and another plastic blow-up doll of the same size full of cement or metal, WHICH ONE WOULD WEIGH MORE ON THE SCALE?????? Muscle is wayyyyyyyyyy denser than fat... and if you are properly nourished your bones will be HEAVY! Also, people with longer torsos sometimes weigh MORE than those with longer legs/shorter torsos (tall people lol).
Another thing i've been doing to torment myself lately is, since i want to decrease the circumference of my thighs but at the same time build deeper cuts/harder legs, I will go HEAVY on deadlifts or after doing squats, eating my post workout meal i will run to my room and measure my legs like a big effing idiot, and freak out at the increased number, usually ONE INCH... well DUUUUUUUHHH my stupid ass just did legs and ate OBVIOUSLY its gonna be higher... I even shy away from lifting as heavy as i can for 20-25 reps out of fear that my legs will get bigger and fatter.. how stupid is that? lol well its not that stupid considering that most females are scared of weights, especially heavier weights... Luckily, for next leg day (this Thursday) I already went over this with my workout buddy and pretty much told him to assassinate my ego if i try to squat JUST the barbell in a pathetic attempt not to get fatter legs.. LOL having my ego crushed ALWAYS works... big proud ALEX hates feeling like a sissy in the weight room :) let's see how i look/feel after this leg day... also, i have some exciting diet modifications coming my way next Monday.. i will be cycling the macro-nutrients/changing the ratios of fats/proteins/carbs to REALLY tighten up... BYE BYE green veggie abundance!!! :') hello higher-fat phase !!!! yipeeeeeeeee! although i will be more lethargic and  may even look flatter, this will help tighten me up in the last  few weeks leading to my show! Soon after I will throw in this SIIIIICK herbal diuretic stack i came up with and play around with sodium/water towards the VERY END... although, is there ever really an end to this vicious cycle ??? :D
Hope you people enjoy my crazy updates and i REALLY hope that i can save at least a few of you from body dysmorphia associated with constant usage of the scale!!! seriously F&CK THAT SHIT!! according to those stupid charts at the doctor's pretty much the whole bodybuilding population is OBESE!!! Because we have more muscle mass and the charts don't take that into account, they tell you there is a FIXED weight for each height class which is beyond retarded and close-minded if you ask me :D
Before I go, i wanna send out a BIGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG hug & THANK YOU to the supportive, amazing people in my life that i bombard with text messages and complaints all day.. YOU GUYS definitely know who you are! You're FREAKING awesome & i LOVE YOUUUUUUUU for putting up with my retarded crazy ass!!! XOXO


Okay, stay tuned for the next progress post ;)












Alex L.